Single & Searching? The Top 5 Hot Spots Where To Meet Your Future Marriage Partner!
- Vicent Nemeyimana
- March 11, 2017
- Word of Life
Did you know that the place where you first meet your lover from says much about your future trends of your relationship? Yes, 51% of 2000 subjects said so. What do you think?
When I was preparing to write about this great topic, someone told me that there cannot be such a specific place where to find or meet your soul-mate. While this is true, the fact remains that there are some special places that have proved themselves through research and so many people’s experience to be rich in long-lasting relationships that end up in marriage.
Recently, As Cited By Author Ruth Styles (2013), a study was done in which about 2000 adults were recruited and asked about meeting places and chances of relationship success. About 51% believed that the place or situation where you meet someone can affect how successful the relationship shall be.
What is my point?
We can say there is no perfect or specific place meant for proper and successful hook-ups, but the fact remains; some places have made records that we cannot deny.
Do you wanna know the surprise?
At The Complete You Ministry, we have done the research and made a list for you of the top 5 places that you are likely to meet a girlfriend or boyfriend and your end is nowhere else but marriage and staying together.
Of course, the Christian perfectionists will think of marriage as wedding in the church, but here we are talking of marriage as that deliberate choosing and deciding done by a couple to stay together, love each other throughout the thick and thin and experience the future life as one.
We wrote a great article on What Marriage Is And When Is It Acceptable To God. Look into that too.
Oh, I am killing you with curiosity, let me jump to what has brought you here today and now;
The 5 most trusted places you are likely to meet your future marriage partner
1. The college/University
I can see you are surprised for maybe you were expecting something different, but sorry I have thwarted your expectations. Personally, I have experienced this and have noted it on hundreds of my other friends and neighbors, yes, college/university relationships work best.
Have I said they work best! Yes, you heard me well. Do you have a college-mate who stole your heart?
For God’s sake, we are not talking about high school kind of relations; we are talking about college or university kind of relationships.
Back to my college times
Between 2010 and 2013, I was a college student at Mutolere School of Nursing and Midwifery and I saw college relationships end up in marriages.
Oh! Did I say that I saw? Oh no,
I did not only see, but I did experience it myself. Surprised? You should not be. Yes, I met Winnie while at college and we have never looked back ever since. I mean, we are married. While at that college, I observed more than ten serious relationships and about 90% are successfully enjoying marriage.
I did not only see, but I did experience it myself. Surprised? You should not be. Yes, I met Winnie while at college and we have never looked back ever since. I mean, we are married. While at that college, I observed more than ten serious relationships and about 90% are successfully enjoying marriage.
To be exact, in my own class, we had three serious relationships and I ask you to believe me when I say that the three ‘couples’ all ended up in marriage. I and Winnie are one of the 3 couples. Do you get what I am saying?
Yes, I am saying that there is a greater chance that a lady and gentleman that hooked or hook up while at school (college) shall end up marrying each other.
The high success rate is attributed to the two people having enough time together and discovering the friendliness in each other. Talking of friendship first and then the real dating, Kris Swiatocho and Cliff Young (2013) wrote something great called; Should You Marry Your Best Friend? Check that too.
Yes, it is at the college that you will see your partner handle embarrassment after giving a wrong answer to the tutor or lecturer, see him or her deal with nasty and disturbing fellow students, experience her energy, creativity and strength in overcoming exam, school fees and girl issues related stress, see her or him in his or her worst moments and best ones.
And also, people are sort of expecting to settle down after college which is much different compared to high school relationships where people still have some journey in terms of education.
And also, people are sort of expecting to settle down after college which is much different compared to high school relationships where people still have some journey in terms of education.
Yes, the college is the perfect place for hook-up; it has everything that makes a relationship successful.
Talking about the advantages of college relationships, Jessica Danielowicz (2015) wrote something great called The Importance of Meeting Your SoulMate In College. Read that piece too.
I met Winnie in the beginnings of 2012 while at the college I talked of before. We spent about 2 years and more months while great friends.
By the time we decided to move on and be lovers, we knew each other in and out and I am confident to say that it is partly why we made it through. For those who follow us closely, you have a glimpse of how our love story was tested beyond our strength and years and, up to now, none of us can explain how we made it out of college alive; the power of love! (We will come back to this in an incredible eBook we hope to share soon).
By the time we decided to move on and be lovers, we knew each other in and out and I am confident to say that it is partly why we made it through. For those who follow us closely, you have a glimpse of how our love story was tested beyond our strength and years and, up to now, none of us can explain how we made it out of college alive; the power of love! (We will come back to this in an incredible eBook we hope to share soon).
Did you hear me well? Yes, you did. College/university relationships are among the most successful ones. If you have some classmate feeling seriously for you and you are playing around, feeling you have more time and many more beauty and handsome to meet and choose from, you may end up with nothing or, worst, with a thief!
Yes, I have said it for I have seen it happen to people.
Yes, I have said it for I have seen it happen to people.
2.The Working Place
Can anyone guess why this one is coming at number two? Two important factors make it great here; traditionally, we expect nothing else other than marriage and settling with a family after school and getting a job or finding what to do and the second reason is people working together have the college-kind of advantages (enough time together).
Of course, you must be wondering why I have not talked of money or support from work-mates? These are important factors too but not as you think.
Here, we are specifically talking of working in the same company, place or same office.
For God’s sake, this is not the same as working class kind of relationships; these ones have a place on the list of failed relationships. Why so? This is for another time. For now, let us see the details of work-mate relationships. It is important to consider some working class kind of relationships come under service-oriented/market meeting place kind of relationships (we have it in this same article).
Here, we are specifically talking of working in the same company, place or same office.
For God’s sake, this is not the same as working class kind of relationships; these ones have a place on the list of failed relationships. Why so? This is for another time. For now, let us see the details of work-mate relationships. It is important to consider some working class kind of relationships come under service-oriented/market meeting place kind of relationships (we have it in this same article).
Back to our point, in the study that we earlier referred to, about 14% of the 2000 adults who met through work ended up married. Do you wanna know w
hy?
hy?
Well, Ruth did try to show some reasons from the study, but we can tell you the reasons right away from here;
Just like at college, you know your work-mate better and she or he is your friend. You see each other almost every day (the same thing married couples do), meet challenges and solve them together, experience the worst and best moments of each other, and can easily figure out the life interest, values and dreams of each other. Yes, work place is a second best place for hook-ups only after college.
Actually, work place would overtake college relationships but at least two limiting factors lessen this spot ‘s core; some people at work are already hooked up (to be precise, they hooked up while still at school and so are not searching) and also working people have many issues other than dating and hook up, but it is only studying and relationships at the college.
Maybe also, the fact that the number of girls and boys in a college A is big offers great diversity for different choices and relationships, the unique advantage that some small companies may never have. Imagine, there is a possibility of having not even one beautiful and hot chick in a company of about 20-30 employees!
Actually, work place would overtake college relationships but at least two limiting factors lessen this spot ‘s core; some people at work are already hooked up (to be precise, they hooked up while still at school and so are not searching) and also working people have many issues other than dating and hook up, but it is only studying and relationships at the college.
Maybe also, the fact that the number of girls and boys in a college A is big offers great diversity for different choices and relationships, the unique advantage that some small companies may never have. Imagine, there is a possibility of having not even one beautiful and hot chick in a company of about 20-30 employees!
Have you ever heard of office romance?
Oh no, don’t tell me you have never! And eh, listen up; I am not speaking of the old guys cheating on their wives and husbands with secretaries and drivers! I am talking of the young men and women deciding not to be alone anymore.
Oh no, don’t tell me you have never! And eh, listen up; I am not speaking of the old guys cheating on their wives and husbands with secretaries and drivers! I am talking of the young men and women deciding not to be alone anymore.
You cannot miss the reasons that Ruth cited out from the study, please read the article. But even before you can click on that link, here is one of those reasons;
“being in a relationship where you work in the same place as your partner also means that you have something in common before you even get to know each other, and being in the same career means you are both like-minded and have similar interests”
“being in a relationship where you work in the same place as your partner also means that you have something in common before you even get to know each other, and being in the same career means you are both like-minded and have similar interests”
Doesn’t the above reason give a hint on why Mr. Museveni Yoweri is the president of Uganda and his wife the minister? Oh no, it is not about them only, I and Winnie are both health workers, and the other two other couples I talked of both each shares the same work with his or her soulmate. Surprised? Surprises shall drown you, it is the truth.
Check it out, what? This; nurses and doctors marry themselves, teachers marry themselves, and oh, Christians marry themselves too. Does that speak something to you? But wait! Talking of Christians marrying themselves, we have more things to first make clear, we will look at this shortly.
Got the point?
If there is a lady that has caught your eyes at your working place, then invest in your desire and chase after her. Truly, chances are she will be your wife soon. You think I am joking? No, don’t forget to invite me when you make the party.
If there is a lady that has caught your eyes at your working place, then invest in your desire and chase after her. Truly, chances are she will be your wife soon. You think I am joking? No, don’t forget to invite me when you make the party.
3. The Church/worship centre.
So many people especially Christian perfectionists expected me to start with this, but only that would have been a lie. While it is true that a gentleman or a woman picked from the church or worship place shall be for marriage, the fact is few people do their pick-up from their churches, not even the pastors and deacons!
Why? For God’s sake, I have not come across an article that tells the disadvantages of dating from the church like that of Justin Campbell. In His article, The Dangers of Church Dating, Justin points out;
“In church the expectation is marriage. This isn’t all bad. It should be the ultimate goal of dating. But it should not be the goal of first date. If a guy approaches a woman, she shouldn’t have to answer if she wants to marry him, just if she wants coffee. At the same time, for the love of all things, a few dates do not a marriage make. No other contexts creates this type of pressure”
After Justin published the above article on November, 20th, 2013, someone commented and said;
“I have been a strong believer in Christ since 1998..i was 13…,now I am 23…and let me tell you, I have never had a consistent Christian lady in my life..I have a friend in the world that told me, ‘the church girl, and or t
he highly materialistic girl, their expectations are too high..They stay super single…Their expectations can be unrealistic..They want a man with Bill Gates type of money.”
he highly materialistic girl, their expectations are too high..They stay super single…Their expectations can be unrealistic..They want a man with Bill Gates type of money.”
Have you heard it? May I say that the church puts so much pressure and emphasis on marriage or single holiness in a way that it ends up losing both!
Look around you; examine your church, mosque or worship place, what is happening? Maybe it is not the worst and yet still it is not the best.
But before we judge that, is the church a dating place? (We will come back to this later in other articles).
But before we judge that, is the church a dating place? (We will come back to this later in other articles).
But eh, what makes the church successfully come at number 3?
Let us share with you the simple logic we have used to rank the worship place number three. Considering the limitations and disadvantages of dating in the church, this should have been the last on our list, but also considering the known fact that at least the few dating and relationships that get constructed within the church end up in marriage, then this spot has a place in our listing.
Got it?
Few reasons foster church hook-ups; women or men within the same church and sharing the same faith are usually expected to be godly, delay or never ask for sex till marriage (this can as well be a hindering factor in case one of the interested parties actually wanted sex), have meaningful lives and friendships, have a good perspective on life and are generally available for the real dating and assessment as we saw in other spots.
I think the general reason why few hook ups happen at the church is because everyone has a way he or she interprets opposite sex relationships and this even gets more problematic among church goers! So no one, neither the brave boy nor the crazy girl is strong enough to say, hey, can we have tea or a drink together this evening?
I mean you are wondering, what will she or he think of me? Am I the devil in the church?
I think the general reason why few hook ups happen at the church is because everyone has a way he or she interprets opposite sex relationships and this even gets more problematic among church goers! So no one, neither the brave boy nor the crazy girl is strong enough to say, hey, can we have tea or a drink together this evening?
I mean you are wondering, what will she or he think of me? Am I the devil in the church?
Talking about time for assessing each other at the church, it is complicated. Just as one person (cited in the above comment on Justin’s article) put it, most of these church goers are not consistent with their characters and personalities. It is common that all people have courtesy and behave well while at church or during church related activities but these same people could be dangerous hyenas in their usual and daily lives.
Actually, it is becoming rare and rarer to meet the right partner from the church!
NB: Here, we are not talking about Christian dating (a Christian dating another Christian) versus missionary dating (a believer dating a non believer), we are talking about hook-up or pick-up or meeting places where we are likely to meet new people (opposite sex) and make them our friends to the point of saying, “will you marry me?”
4. The market/service-oriented
Oh you know it, don’t you? I mean it is possible that a man or a woman will actually fall for that person that is available to him or her daily during their buying and selling of goods and services. This also constitutes the working class kind of relationships.
As you may already know, I come from Kisoro district, Bunagana Parish. Around, 2010 and 2014, many youth of my age and a little bit older were seriously buying motorcycles. Yeah, the business was hot!
Everyone was thinking of a boda-boda motorcycle, all except me! You wonder why I could not think of one! This shall be another time’s story, but I can give you a hint; the heart longs for that it can have. Really, I was poor.
Everyone was thinking of a boda-boda motorcycle, all except me! You wonder why I could not think of one! This shall be another time’s story, but I can give you a hint; the heart longs for that it can have. Really, I was poor.
Back to our point
After some months following the crazy rapture of motorcycle business, many of those boda-boda riders started marrying, one after the other. And guess what! Almost all of them would marry girls or ladies that had been their clients, call them passengers.
Do you get it?
Yes, you do. I am saying you are likely gonna fall in love with that man that services your compound, works out your car, sells you the Christmas designs or serves you food every evening near your rented room.
Of course, you are now thinking of the Shamba boys or the ones you call ‘cheap guys’ that wash your car, and, sadly, that is not what I am talking about. First, those guys are not just cheap because they cut your compound or service your car and, secondly, some of them make good relationships.
And thirdly, I am talking of your equals who you serve in one way and they serve you in the other way round.
And thirdly, I am talking of your equals who you serve in one way and they serve you in the other way round.
Yes, there has been many reports of nurses and doctors falling in love with their patients or caretakers. There have been many reports of musicians falling in love with their Djs or producers or managers. And there have been a good number of marriages between bartenders or waitresses and their clients.
Still confusing?
Think about it in this way; it is the love and romantic relationship that soon develops between a service provider and his or her client because of their frequent contact and getting used to each other.
The factors that foster this are easy to see;
it is easy to be taken by the warm smile of the lady that serves you tea at the famous Java restaurant near you. Yes, the client-service provider relationship makes it easy for the progress. And also, these people are close for monitoring and assessment, are usually both are working, and are experiencing the usefulness and creativity in each other’s work or service.
And then one day, the desire strikes; I want your services in a deeper and meaningful manner more than the one we already have.
And then one day, the desire strikes; I want your services in a deeper and meaningful manner more than the one we already have.
Are we clear?
Yes, handle every client with care and respect; some of them are our, I mean your (for I am already married and contented) future husband or wife in disguise! Before you laugh, think through it; is there no one who has been at your service and you have been wondering what makes you feel excited when she or he shows up! Yes, it is possible you are upgrading your relation from just market or service oriented thing to real relationship.
5. Journey/travel
A good number of relationships emerged when two people met on a certain journey. Yes, it could be in a taxi here in Kampala, on a bus to Kisoro or Kalamoja, on a long journey to fetch water (common in our villagers) or even on a train or freight to Amsterdam or USA and you are, by luck, seated near a hot chick or gentleman that you are unable to finish off the journey minus saying the magic word, ‘can we be friends?’
You say, ah Vicent; that is not common! And allow me to oppose you and say, “it is because you are, maybe, settled already, shy or don’t travel, but there is a powerful temptation (very positive) that occurs when your next passenger in the seat is a hot chick or handsome guy and you are single and searching”
Talking about love relationships on journey that end up in marriage, Nina Ragusa (2016) wrote an amazing article called, The 14 Love Stories That Started With Travel. You may read that too. But before you get drowned in this, we need to caution you;
Most hook-ups that happen on bus, tax, train or even in the hotel room of travelers end up in short-term relationships or even one night-stand kind of sex.
Why? Really, should we even answer this?
Well, the answer is amazing; it is because these people are already travelers, and settling is not in their blood. Yeah, a few of these can keep up with communication and nurture their relationships especially if they live in one region or same country, but this is rare and so we put this spot as last on our list.
The reasons that make a journey or travel one of those hook-up spots are; each of the two people i
s lonely and needs a friend, there are opportunities to share personal stories and know each other, chances of playing the good Samaritan gospel (for example, buying her a drink or snack while travelling), and chances are the two people have similar interests and aspirations, the same reason that they could both be on the same bus or train.
s lonely and needs a friend, there are opportunities to share personal stories and know each other, chances of playing the good Samaritan gospel (for example, buying her a drink or snack while travelling), and chances are the two people have similar interests and aspirations, the same reason that they could both be on the same bus or train.
Usually, these relations die off after the journey but a few of them thrive and mature into marriages.
Even though relationships made during travels and journeys usually don’t last, they are far better than those at parties, bars, clubs or even celebrities’ night shows that almost all end up in a one night stand or just short-term sexual relationships.
Summary
Just as Brad Paisley emphasizes that every person and miracle we see humans do is as a result of two people falling in love (check his lyrics of the song, Because Two People Fell In Love), I am confident to also add that for every two people that fell in love, there was their first meeting place.
Yes, there are hundreds of meeting places and thousands of ways to spice up your first encounter (we shall come back to this best way of spicing up your first dating evening later), but the above 5 spots or places make the most of such a meeting place list.
Satisfied? Yes, I believe you have been helped.
If you have made your observations keenly, the strength of a relationship and ultimate end in marriage is so much possible among those who have had time to be friends other than strangers in the club or on a freight jet.
For God’s sake, it is not common to play hide and sick with a woman or man you have been familiar with at school, work, church or even market place (has been serving you in one way or the other), but chances of playing each other and only hold on for sex and fun are more common among those who meet at the club, bar, wedding or company’s feast or even in a hotel room or on a train.
Satisfied? Yes, I believe you have been helped.
If you have made your observations keenly, the strength of a relationship and ultimate end in marriage is so much possible among those who have had time to be friends other than strangers in the club or on a freight jet.
For God’s sake, it is not common to play hide and sick with a woman or man you have been familiar with at school, work, church or even market place (has been serving you in one way or the other), but chances of playing each other and only hold on for sex and fun are more common among those who meet at the club, bar, wedding or company’s feast or even in a hotel room or on a train.
Conclusion
I love Psychology today, these guys have every great article in relation to human psycho-social life and we shall invite them to summarize our topic with their article called How And Where To Meet Women And Men. In this article, Jeremy Nicholson (2014) said, “there are a number of successful places and ways to meet people.
Therefore, how and where to meet women or men may depend on your own relationship goals, needs and preferences”.
He even goes ahead and highlights these goals or needs as; for long-term relationship, short-term relationship, and for more specific preferences and needs.
Therefore, how and where to meet women or men may depend on your own relationship goals, needs and preferences”.
He even goes ahead and highlights these goals or needs as; for long-term relationship, short-term relationship, and for more specific preferences and needs.
However, just as we emphasized from the beginning, our focus is only on relationships that last long and end up honoring God and those involved through marriage and our list was compiled in relation to such honorable relationships.
Remember, having sexual relations that are outside marriage or that are homosexual in nature is a sin to us, the people and God, the creator.
Remember, having sexual relations that are outside marriage or that are homosexual in nature is a sin to us, the people and God, the creator.
God bless you.
If this post has inspired you, then share with all your other friends so that they benefit too. Remember to use the facebook, twitter, linkedIn, email, google plus and pinterest icons showed up here and share with your other audience.
Yes, I believe you can.
The Complete You Ministry, www.miklahlife.com
